Who's celebrating a Birthday today?

Nolan Ryan Lynn Nolan Ryan Born: January 31, 1947, Refugio, Texas Batted: right Threw: right Played for: New York Mets, California Angels, Houston Astros, Texas Rangers Elected to Hall of Fame by BBWAA: 1999, 491 votes of 497 ballots cast: 98.79% Career Pitching Record Hall of Fame Plaque With a blazing fastball that approached 100 mph and a work ethic like no other, Nolan Ryan dominated hitters for an unparalleled 27 seasons on his way to an all-time record 5,714 strikeouts. During four decades of prominence, he totaled 324 victories and a host of major league records. Most notable of his milestones are a mystifying seven no-hitters and 12 one-hitters. The eight-time All-Star fanned a record 383 batters in 1973, and his career strikeouts encompassed 1,176 different players. Did you know ... that Nolan Ryan is the only pitcher to strike out the side on nine pitched balls in both the National League (April 19, 1968) and the American League (July 9, 1972)?

THIS IS SO CUTE

Dear God,
I'm writing to say I'm sorry
For being angry yesterday
When you seemed to ignore my prayer
And things didn't go my way

First, my car broke down
I was very late for work
But I missed that awful accident
Was that your handiwork?

I found a house I loved
But others got there first
I was angry, then relieved
When I heard the pipes had burst!

Yesterday, I found the perfect dress
But the color was too pale
Today, I found the dress in red
Would you believe, it was on sale!

I know you're watching over me
And I'm feeling truly blesset
For no matter what I pray for
You always know what's best!

I have this circle of E-mail friends,
Who mean the world to me;
Some days I "send" and "send,"
At other times, I let them be.

I am so blessed to have these friends,
With whom I've grown so close;
So this little poem I dedicate to them,
Because to me they are the "Most"!

When I see each name download,
And view the message they've sent;
I know they've thought of me that day,
And "well wishes" were their intent.

So to you, my friends, I would like to say,
Thank you for being a part;
Of all my daily contacts,
This comes right from my heart.

God bless you all is my prayer today,
I'm honored to call you "friend";
I pray the Lord will keep you safe,
Until we write again.

Had a friend sent this to me. Thought it was nice.

Weekend Fun

Well it's Monday. My weekend sucked. I did go to the movies on Sunday with a girlfriend. We went to see a really cool movie. "Coach Carter" it was kind of lengthily movie, but it had a great story even though it didn't end the way I wanted it to. I really recommend you go check out this move. Samuel L Jackson did an amazing job on this charter.

Average is just not good enough. Period." This philosophy is one that is followed by the very real Coach Ken Carter, who oversees the direction of Richmond High School's basketball program in California. In 1999, Carter found himself in the center of controversy when he locked out his entire Varsity basketball team (including his own son) in order to motivate and push them to improve their grades. Not only did the coach close the gym, but he also banned any and all basketball-related activities. He was even prepared to cancel his entire season after 15 of his 45 players failed to live up to the classroom standards they agreed to in a contract they had signed earlier in the semester. His approach worked for at least one of the kids: his son Damien made the honor roll from that time until his graduation, and was accepted to West Point Academy. Taking on the role of the individualistic coach is Samuel L. Jackson, who will work among some fine up and coming young actors. The Rookie's memorable Rick Gonzalez is onboard along with Rob Brown (Finding Forrester), and Robert Richard (Feast of All Saints). Also appearing in her first movie role ever is Ashanti, who will play the girlfriend of one of the basketball players. It's a terrific, uplifting sports story, and should find a solid audience similar to Hoosiers, Remember the Titans or Miracle. There's definitely value in showing kids that there's more to life than succeeding in sports alone. Very awesome movie inspirational

Who Wears the Trousers

This was so funny!

Jack was about to marry Jill when his father took him to one side...

" When I married your mother, the first thing I did when we got home was take off my trousers," he said. "I gave them to your mother and told her to put them on. When she did, they were enormous on her and she said to me that she couldn't possibly wear them, as they were too large. I told her, "of course they're too big. I wear the trousers in this family and I always will." ever since that day, we have never had a single problem

Jack took his father's advice and as soon as he got Jill alone after the wedding, he did the same thing; took off his trousers, gave them to Jill and told her to put them on. Jill said that the trousers were too big and she couldn't possibly wear them. "Exactly," replied Jack. "I wear the trousers in this relationship and I always will. I don't want you to forget that".

Jill paused for a moment and removed her knickers. She gave them to Jack. "Try these on," she said, so he tried them on but they were too small.

I can't possibly get into your knickers," said Jack.

"Exactly," replied Jill. "And if you don't change your f*cking attitude, you never will."

Brought to you by Goose

Thought this was intresting. Found this on one of our local radio stations site.

But please note this has no relation to my relationship with Richard.

Top 25 All-time wedding songs

Because You Loved Me - Celine Dion
I Swear - John M. Montgomery
Everything I Do, I Do It For You - Bryan Adams
Have I Told You Lately - Rod Stewart
Keeper of The Stars - Tracy Byrd
Wonderful Tonight - Eric Clapton
Unchained Melody - Righteous Brothers
Can't Help Falling in Love - Elvis Presley
I Cross My Heart - George Strait
Power of Love - Celine Dion
Unforgettable - Nat "King" & Natalie Cole
Always and Forever - Heatwave
True Companion - Marc Cohn
Beautiful in My Eyes - Joshua Kadison
What a Wonderful World - Louis Armstrong
Could I Have This Dance - Anne Murray
I Will Always Love You - Whitney Houston
You and I - Eddie Rabbit & Crystal Gayle
Always - Atlantic Starr
As Long as I Live - John Michael Montgomery
Love of a Lifetime - Firehouse
Now and Forever Richard Marx
When a Man Loves a Woman - Percy Sledge
Kiss by a Rose - Seal
Grow Old With Me - Mary Chapin Carpenter

WORST wedding songs?
"She Hates Me"
"End of The Road"
"I Don't Care Anymore" (Phil Collins)
"Heartache Tonight" Eagles
"Love Bites" (Def)
"You give love a bad name"
"What's Love Got To Do With It"
"Janie's Got a Gun"

Can we believe what comes out of kids mouths?

Ever notice how a 4 year old's voice is louder than 200 adult voices? Several years ago, I returned home from a trip just when a storm hit with crashing thunder and severe lightning. As I came into my bedroom about 2 a.m., I found my two children in bed with my wife, Karey, apparently scared by the loud storm. I resigned myself to sleep in the guest bedroom that night.
The next day, I talked to the children, and explained that it was O.K. to sleep with Mom when the storm was bad, but when I was expected home, please don't sleep with Mom that night. They said OK. After my next trip several weeks later, Karey and the children picked me up in the terminal at the appointed time.
Since the plane was late, everyone had come into the terminal to wait for my plane's arrival, along with hundreds of other folks waiting for their arriving passengers. As I entered the waiting area, my son saw me, and came running shouting, "Hi, Dad! I've got some good news!"
As I waved back, I said loudly, "What's the good news?"
"Nobody slept with Mommy while you were away this time!" Alex shouted.
The airport became very quiet, as everyone in the waiting area looked at Alex, then turned to me, and then searched the rest of the area to see if they could figure out exactly who his Mom was.
Brought to you Convicted

Wouldn't this suck?

I don't get to post much off of my honeys blog becasue he usely only keeps naked women on there and I am trying to keep my blog SFW but he found this and it made me say What the Fuck?

Who do we feel more sorry for?

The Deer


Or the ?

Click here to see the rest of the pics.....

DAMN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Things Hallmark Cards Don't Say

Though this were pretty funny.

My tire was thumping.
I thought it was flat
When I looked at the tire ...
I noticed your cat.
Sorry!

Heard your wife left you,
How upset you must be.
But don't fret about it..
She moved in with me.

Looking back over the years
that we've been together,
I can't help but wonder...
"What the hell was I thinking?"

Congratulations on your wedding day!
Too bad no one likes your husband.

How could two people as beautiful as you
Have such an ugly baby?

I've always wanted to have
someone to hold,
someone to love.
After having met you ..
I've changed my mind.

I must admit, you brought Religion into my life.
I never believed in Hell until I met you.

As the days go by, I think of how lucky I am...
That you're not here to ruin it for me.

Congratulations on your promotion.
Before you go...
Would you like to take this knife out of my back?
You'll probably need it again.

Happy Birthday, Uncle Dad!
(Available only in Tennessee, Kentucky & West Virginia)

Happy birthday! You look great for your age.
Almost Lifelike!

When we were together,
you always said you'd die for me.
Now that we've broken up,
I think it's time you kept your promise.

We have been friends for a very long time ...
let's say we stop?

I'm so miserable without you
it's almost like you're here.

Congratulations on your new bundle of joy.
Did you ever find out who the father was?

Your friends and I wanted to do
something special for your birthday.
So we're having you put to sleep.

So your daughter's a hooker,
and it spoiled your day.
Look at the bright side,
it's really good pay.

Thanks Convicted

Here is my daily picture Its Friday Woohooo. Hope everyone has a great weekend! ;-)

Alright guys Valentines is coming up so here are some good presents that you could get your lady ;-)

Personalized Loving Promise Ring

Dozen Red Roses Delievered to her work ;-)
These are also some nice flowers to send to her at work ;-)

Red Swarovski® Heart Bracelet

Pink Tourmaline Hrt 14W Gold Pendant

Deluxe Hugs and Kisses

Sterling Silver Interlocking Hearts Necklace

Delicates® Romantic Collection Merriwidow Set ( I like this one )

Friday Movie Release

Alone in the Dark (R); Wide release
You wake up in the middle of the night with the feeling someone is in the room with you. You get a flash of panic as you fumble for your bedside lamp. But when you turn on the light, no one is there. There is a world around us, a world most of us never see--or never want to see. As a child, Edward Carnby was given irrefutable proof of that world. He hasn't slept well since. Now, twenty years later, Edward is a paranormal investigator. When the irrational and the inexplicable become undeniable, he is there. He is not out to change your mind. But he may be the only one who can save your life. Now, the greatest mystery of Edward's past is about to become the most dangerous case he has ever faced. Nineteen people have disappeared, and they have only one thing in common--each one grew up in the same orphanage as Edward. Looking for answers, Edward learns that an ancient artifact of considerable power has been discovered in a long-lost shipwreck. Amidst mounting danger, he turns to Aline Cedrac, a brilliant anthropologist who's also his ex-flame--and the only person he really trusts. In a world of ancient evils, lost civilizations, shadowy government conspiracies, and deadly paranormal threats, Edward and Aline come together to confront a supernatural enemy unlike anything they've ever seen before--one whose very existence could threaten all humankind.

Starring: Christian Slater, Tara Reid, Stephen Dorff, Will Sanderson, Ed Anders
Director(s): Uwe Boll

Hide and Seek (R); Wide release
"Come out, come out, wherever you are!" That command is familiar to everyone who has played the children's game, Hide and Seek. The words and game take us back to an innocent carefree time in our lives, where the simple goal was to find hiding playmates. Many children could even enjoy a spirited game with imaginary friends. But then, imaginary friends can sometimes seem so real…For young Emily Callaway, her games of Hide and Seek with an imaginary friend named Charlie have become anything but simple and innocent. Instead, she finds herself in the middle of a series of increasingly nightmarish acts that even her father David cannot stop. Who--or what--is Charlie? David wonders. How can an "imaginary" entity have this kind of hold on her? Maybe Charlie is not imaginary at all, but instead a flesh-and-blood, malevolent presence?

Starring: Robert De Niro, Dakota Fanning, Famke Janssen, Melissa Leo, Elisabeth Shue
Director(s): John Polson

Another great Rock - Roll Ideal is having a birthday.
Drummer Nicholas Berkeley Mason with Pink Floyd is celebrating his 61 birthday today!

I never got the pleasure of seeing Pink Floyd in concert but I love all their albums.

Hey Guy's do you need a job?

Brought to u by Coolio

Would you go this far to get your wife back if you fucked up?

Full Page Newspaper Ad Asks Wife To Come Back

JACKSONVILLE, Fla. -- When five dozen roses didn't work, an estranged husband took out a full-page newspaper advertisement to ask his wife for forgiveness.

"Please believe the words in my letter, they are true and from my heart," read the ad in Tuesday's edition of The Florida Times-Union. "I can only hope you will give me the chance to prove my unending love for you. Life without you is empty and meaningless."

Larry, who declined to give his last name, sent the $17,000 apology to Marianne, his wife of 17 years. She left him almost two weeks ago, he said.

"It was a culmination of things," he told the newspaper. "But I am desperately trying to save our marriage."

Larry, who lives in Orlando, said his wife is staying with her parents near Jacksonville. But they blocked him from entering their gated community and she changed her cell phone number so he can't get in touch with her.

A relative told him that Marianne saw the advertisement.

"She said my wife read the ad and started crying. But so far I've had no response from her," Larry said.

But the ad drew the attention of many other readers, who contacted the paper.

"They want to know if she has responded and if they have worked things out," said Jay Weimar, director of display advertising. "We tell them we are pulling for him."

Brought to you by Coolio

It's A Real Pussy "I promise"...



Brought to you by TTR2
Chris always has the coolest things.

I bet this man wishes he stayed in his SUV!

Compton man to face criminal charges in deadly California commuter rail tragedy

The man whom authorities say caused the chain-reaction train derailment that killed 11 people was to face criminal charges Thursday for leaving his sport utility vehicle on a railroad track after apparently changing his mind about committing suicide. Nearly 200 were injured.

Juan Manuel Alvarez, 25, got out of his green Jeep Cherokee before the two commuter trains crashed Wednesday morning on the outskirts of Los Angeles. He stood by as gruesome collision scattered wreckage and bodies over a quarter-mile of track.

Authorities arrested Alvarez and he was held without bail in a hospital's jail ward after apparently slitting his own wrists and stabbing himself in the chest. The case has been presented to the district attorney's office, and Glendale police spokesman Sgt. Tom Lorenz told The Associated Press on Thursday, "We're told they're confident they'll file multiple counts of first-degree murder."

On Wednesday, however, Los Angeles County District Attorney Steve Cooley said Alvarez could face manslaughter charges. "The state of mind of the suspect is a central issue, what led him to do whatever acts he did do," he said.

Alvarez's SUV was stuck between tracks away from a crossing and once there, he could not have moved it even if he had tried, Metrolink CEO David Solow said. The southbound train that struck it bolted skyward, hit a parked Union Pacific car, then clipped the northbound train.

The crash was the worst U.S. rail tragedy since March 15, 1999, when an Amtrak train hit a truck and derailed near Bourbonnais, Ill., killing 11 people and injuring more than 100.

"I hope that we're able to assess this in a way that we can figure out: Is there a way that we can stop one crazed individual from creating this kind of carnage?" Los Angeles Mayor James Hahn told reporters.

Among the two women and nine men killed was a Los Angeles County sheriff's deputy on his way to work. About two dozen people were hospitalized in critical condition.

Glendale Fire Chief Christopher Gray said early Thursday that firefighters, unable to get into parts of the mangled train overnight, were still actively searching for one person who remained missing.

The wounded Alvarez was under suicide watch but was listed in stable condition, and Sheriff Lee Baca said Thursday on CBS' "The Early Show" that "he was rather astounded himself as to what the outcome was."

Alvarez's estranged wife, Carmelita Alvarez, had ordered him out of her home months ago, her family said, and in November she went to court seeking a temporary restraining order keeping him away from herself, their 3-year-old son, her mother, brother and other family members.

"He is using drugs and has been in and out of rehab twice," she said in asking for the restraining order, which was granted Dec. 14. "He threatened to take our kid away and to hurt my family members," she added. "He is planning on selling his vehicle to buy a gun and threatened to use it."

Alvarez, who lived in a converted garage behind her sister's home in suburban Compton, told the court her husband had damaged her family's property and threatened to seek revenge on people he suspected of introducing her to another man. She said his drug use was triggering hallucinations.

She went into seclusion shortly after the crash.

The victims of Wednesday's crash included several public employees who worked in or around Los Angeles, including sheriff's deputy James Tutino, 47, whose flag-draped body was saluted by law enforcement officers and firefighters as it was carried from the wreckage.

Metrolink trains are allowed to cruise at a maximum speed of 79 mph, but the two involved were likely going slower than that, Solow said. The force of the collision, which happened about 6 a.m., hurled passengers down the trains' aisles.

"I heard a noise. It got louder and louder," said passenger Diane Brady, 56, of Simi Valley. "And next thing I knew the train tilted, everyone was screaming and I held onto a pole for dear life. I held on for what seemed like a week and a half it seemed. It was a complete nightmare."

First on the scene were workers at a Costco store next to the tracks. They helped take some of the injured away in shopping carts. Uninjured passengers also joined the rescue effort. As a light rain fell, more than 300 firefighters climbed ladders into windows of battered train cars to rescue scores of injured.

Costco employee Hugo Moran said an elderly man covered in blood and soot and with apparent broken arms and legs was pulled out of the wreckage but died soon after. Before he died, he thanked his rescuers and asked them to pray for him.

Another trapped man had used his own blood to write a note on a seat bottom. Using the heart symbol, he wrote "I love my kids" and "I love Leslie."

The man's identity wasn't known, but Los Angeles Fire Department spokesman Capt. Rex Vilaubi said he was removed from the wreckage alive.

What's your purescore?

Thanks to Joker, Here is a quiz to find out how sexually pure you are!

I had fun with it.

I scored a "38"

Well here is the damn picture of the day. I have just had one of the worst mornings. I feel like shit, I got up late, I went out to my truck had a damn flat tire, didnt win the lottery last night. So damn this Thursday. It better get better.

Well here we go I wasnt going to asnwer this because I am trying to keep my site SFW but what the hell. Convicted and Uberbitch wanted me to answer the dildo questions passed on by virtually every blogging site that I've viewed in the last week or so. Well here we go.

1. Have you ever used toys or other things during sex?

Yes Yes and Hell Yes!


2. Would you consider using dildos or other sexual toys in the future?

Hell Yea anything anytime, with only Richard of course. ;-)


3. What is your kinkiest fantasy you have yet to realize?

Ummmm ... I've pretty much have full filled any fantasies I've had already but, if I figure one out Richard will be the first one to know.

4. Who gave you this dildo?

Convicted & Unberbitch

5. Who are the ones to recieve this dildo from you?

I guess I will pass this on to my honey bunney Richard at Fu-qtoo along with his buddy John and my friend Roc!

The guys over at Fu-qtoo has put together a shirt for Andy Matello I actually have one of my own.

So get over to Fu-qtoo and buy a damn shirt.

Guess who's birthday it is today?

Sammy Hagar turns 50 today!With many bad ass tones under his belt when he was with Van Halen, now in his group The RedRockers hopefully we will continue to hear more hits from the rocker himself. Happy Birthday Sammy!

Here is my Daily Pic It's Hump Day once again!

On This Day In History

1998
"I did not have sexual relations with that woman."
Bill Clinton

Brought to you by The Goose

Found this song and I about died. It was so funny! Get ready to laugh your ass off.

Thanks Flowgo

This was too funny to pass up! Thanks Convicted

A betting lady

An elderly woman walked into the Bank of Canada one morning with a purse full of money. She wanted to open a savings account and insisted on talking to the president of the Bank because, she said, she had a lot of money. After many lengthy discussions (after all, the client is always right) an employee took the elderly woman to the president's office.
The president of the Bank asked her how much she wanted to deposit. She placed her purse on his desk and replied, "$165,000". The president was curious and asked her how she had been able to save so much money. The elderly woman replied that she made bets. The president was surprised and asked, "What kind of bets?"
The elderly woman replied, "Well, I bet you $25,000 that your testicles are square."
The president started to laugh and told the woman that it was impossible to win a bet like that. The woman never batted an eye. She just looked at the president and said, "Would you like to take my bet?"
"Certainly", replied the president. "I bet you $25,000 that my test1cles are not square."
"Done", the elderly woman answered. "But given the amount of money involved, if you don't mind I would like to come back at 10 o'clock tomorrow morning with my lawyer as a witness."
"No problem", said the president of the Bank confidently.
That night, the president became very nervous about the bet and spent a long time in front of the mirror examining his test1cles, turning them this way and that, checking them over again and again until he was positive that no one could consider his test1cles as square and reassuring himself that there was no way he could lose the bet.
The next morning at exactly 10 o'clock the elderly woman arrived at the president's office with her lawyer and acknowledged the $25,000 bet made the day before that the president's test1cles were square. The president confirmed that the bet was the same as the one made the day before. Then the elderly woman asked him to drop his pants etc.. so hat she and her lawyer could see clearly.
The president was happy to oblige.
The elderly woman came closer so she could see better and asked the president if she could touch them. "Of course", said the president "Given the amount of money involved, you should be 100% sure."
The elderly woman did so with a little smile.
Suddenly the president noticed that the lawyer was banging his head against the wall. He asked the elderly woman why he was doing that and she replied, "Oh, it's probably because I bet him $100,000 that around 10 o'clock in the morning I would be holding the balls of the President of the Bank of Canada!"

Can you believe what this world is coming to? This was the topic on a radio show I listen to every morning.

WOULD YOU LET YOUR DAUGHTER WEAR THIS PROM DRESS?
By DANICA LO

January 25, 2005 -- PROM princess or porn queen?



This prom dress is so skimpy, even the designer's CEO wouldn't let his teenage daughter wear it. But the dangerously revealing gown, prominently advertised in Seventeen Prom, YM Prom and Teen Prom, and on sale in a Midtown shop, is a top seller for the company this season.

Full story
PHOTO This $495 dress, on sale at a Manhattan store, is a top-selling prom look for the designer.
- Liz Sullivan

How To Impress People

How To Impress People

How Men Can Impress Women:

Compliment her,
cuddle her,
kiss her,
caress her,
love her,
stroke her,
tease her,
comfort her,
protect her,
hug her,
hold her,
spend money on her,
wine & dine her,
buy things for her,
listen to her,
care for her,
stand by her,
support her,
go to the ends of the earth for her....

How Women Can Impress Men

Show up naked.
Bring Beer

Brought to you by TTR2

Open The Fu*king Safe!

Read this on TTR2 blog and it so made me think about Richard, because he would so do that.

Open The Fu*king Safe!

A guy in a mask bursts into a sperm bank with a shotgun. "Open the fucking safe!" he yells at the woman behind the counter.

"But we're not a real bank," she replies, "we don't have any money, this is a sperm bank."

"Don't fucking argue, open the fucking safe or I'll blow your head off!" says the guy with the gun. She obliges and once she's opened the safe door the guy says, "Take out one of the bottles and drink it."

"But it's full of sperm!' she replies nervously.

"Don't argue, just drink it' he says. She pries the cap off and gulps it down."

"Take out another one and drink it, too!" he demands. She takes out another and drinks it as well. Suddenly the guy pulls off the mask and to the woman's amazement it's her husband!

"There!" he says, "it's not that fucking difficult is it?!"

January 24 The Most Depressing Day!

January 24 The Most Depressing Day!

Academics have dubbed January 24 as the most depressing day of the year for workers, as they realise the festive season is a distant memory and they must wait months for their next holiday. Plus it's Monday! So I say just...............................................

Brought to you by TTR2

Well it's Monday and here is my "Daily Picture"

You know I'm certaintly not the love expert. Just believe that or you can ask Richard, but I found this article and I thought it was very interesting.

When should you tell your spouse,
"We have a problem"

A marital complaint usually falls into one of two broad categories:

1) "You are not meeting my emotional needs," or
2) "Your behavior is upsetting me."

The first category reflects a failure to make your spouse happy, and the second category reflects a failure to avoid making your spouse unhappy.

When you meet your spouse's emotional needs, you deposit love units into your spouse's Love Bank. And when you avoid behavior that makes your spouse unhappy, you avoid withdrawing love units. That combination leads to romantic love, the feeling of incredible attraction that is essential in a happy and fulfilling marriage. So if your spouse ever registers a complaint in either of these two categories, my advice to you is to take care of the problem as quickly as possible. Don't wait for it to become an even greater problem, in hopes that it will eventually go away. And then, let the Policy of Joint Agreement (never do anything without an enthusiastic agreement between you and your spouse) guide you to a solution.

I give you this advice because I want you and your spouse to be in love with each other, and I'm sure that you want that, too. But most marital therapists disagree with me on this issue. Because their advice is so pervasive, and so destructive to the love of couples that follow it, I use whatever opportunity I have to defend this crucial position.

The difference between my approach to saving marriages, and the approach of most other therapists, is that I focus on building romantic love (being "in love") between spouses, rather than simply focusing on conflict resolution. As it turns out, I also address conflict resolution, but I do it in a way that builds love between spouses.

Since most marital therapists fail to address the romantic love issue when they try to help couples, their approach to conflict resolution usually fails to build love, and as a result, the couples divorce, even after "resolving" some of their conflicts.

An example of this current effort to "resolve" marital conflicts is found in a book by Jacobson and Christensen, Integrative Couples Therapy (Norton, 1996). In this training manual for marital therapists, couples are to be encouraged by their therapists to lower their marital expectations by becoming more understanding of each other's dysfunctional background. Irreparable wounds inflicted during childhood should inspire empathy toward a thoughtless spouse, not disappointment. Awareness of each other's limitations should lead to acceptance of each other's behavior and a willingness to meet one's own needs, instead of expecting each other to meet those needs. The suggested goal of therapy is to teach each spouse to make themselves happy, and not look to each other for their happiness. While this approach to therapy may resolve a couple's conflict, it most certainly will not lead to love. When couples follow this advice, few love units are deposited and many are withdrawn. In the end, the couple is likely to divorce.

The same sort of advice is given in Getting the Love You Want by Hendrix (Holt Rinehart, & Winston, 1988). While the book title seems to address the issue of romantic love in marriage, the author's strategy for couples is to learn to accept each other's marital failures, rather than doing anything to overcome them. I guarantee you, if you follow this strategy, you will NOT get the love you want.

My experience, and the experience of a few others who are carefully studying what it takes for a couple to be satisfied with their marriage, proves the opposite of what is currently being popularly recommended. Instead of spouses trying to lower their expectations, I believe that they should raise them. Instead of spouses learning to meet their own emotional needs, I believe that they should expect to have them met by each other, and met in a professional manner. Why? Because that's what it takes for a couple to be in love and stay in love. Furthermore, couples should not waste their time trying to "understand" each other's failures, but rather, they should try to overcome them as quickly as possible so the issue does not have time to drain their Love Banks.

In a great, but mind-numbing, article entitled "The Mathematics of Marital Conflict: Dynamic Mathematical Nonlinear Modeling of Newlywed Marital Interaction" (Gottman, Swanson and Murray. J. of Family Psychology, 1999, Vol. 13, No.1, 3-19), the authors provide evidence that couples should not "let things ride and have a chance to build up" (p. 17). Instead, couples should address any conflict as soon as it arises, and resolve it quickly. The authors indicate that the biblical principle from Ephesians (4:26), may be helpful in marriage, "Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry."

In this study, newlyweds who divorced within 6 years were compared with those who remained married during those years. It was found that the divorced couples tended not to respond to each other's complaints as quickly as those who remained married. These divorced couples ignored each other's complaints until they became intensely negative. Those who remained married, on the other hand, went to work addressing each other's complaints soon after they were mentioned, not giving the complaint a chance to build up.

My experience with couples agrees with the results of this study. In successful marriages, spouses expect to change to accommodate each other's needs, so when a spouse registers a complaint, it's a signal for action. In failed marriages, on the other hand, spouses expect to be accepted as they are, without change. A complaint is interpreted as an unwillingness to love unconditionally, a failure of the complaining spouse. So instead of adjusting to the complaint, the defense is offered, "if you really loved me, you would not try to change me. You would let me continue to do whatever it is I'm doing."

The Buyer and the Renter

In my Q&A column, Living Together Before Marriage, I described two approaches to marital conflict: The approach of the Buyer and the approach of the Renter. To help you understand why it may be difficult for you to complain to your spouse as soon as problem arises, I return to that analogy.

When a couple live together before marriage, they tend to be "renters." By that I mean that they view their relationship much as they would renting an apartment. If something goes wrong in an apartment, the landlord is expected to fix it -- if it needs paint, the landlord paints it; if it needs repairs, the landlord does the repairing. In other words, the renter is not responsible for making the apartment suitable for living -- the landlord is responsible. And if the apartment is not repaired, the tenant isn't expected to fix the apartment himself, he simply moves to another apartment if he doesn't like the one he is renting.

In the same way, couples who live together before marriage do not expect to make many changes to accommodate their lovers. The relationship is a test of how "livable" their relationship is, and if they were to find it uncomfortable, or if one were to complain much, it would mean that they would not be right for each other.

Those who live together before marriage tend to ignore conflicts until they become intensely negative. That's why these relationships are notoriously abusive (as reported in a recent Justice Department study on domestic abuse). If these couples eventually marry, they carry their renter's agreement into marriage, with the same tendency to ignore conflicts until they build up. Since the renter's agreement does not promote healthy adjustment in marriage, or the sustaining of romantic love -- the vast majority of these marriages end in divorce.

On the other hand, when couples marry before they live together, they tend to be "buyers." Much like buying a house, these couples realize that if anything needs fixing, they will have to fix it -- the sooner, the better. Their marriage is not a test of how livable their relationship is, but rather, it's a commitment to make their relationship livable. That means that when a problem first surfaces, they go right to work fixing it, knowing that if they don't fix it soon, it can lead to an even bigger problem later.

This is where my approach to building love in marriage makes a crucial point -- unless you and your spouse build your lifestyle together like a buyer, where you change your own behavior to make each other happy and avoid making each other unhappy, you will destroy the love you once had for each other. The buyer's approach to a relationship helps sustain the feeling of love because each spouse changes his or her own behavior to meet each other's needs and avoid hurting each other. The renter's approach, on the other hand, expects the other person to accept one's behavior as it is, and that, in turn, leads to a loss of love and eventual divorce.

So, how soon should you begin in your effort to address each other's complaints? My answer: As soon as the complaint is first made. Why wait for a complaint to turn into a demand, or a disrespectful judgment or an angry outburst? Why not deal with the issue immediately, as soon as it is spoken.

How should you tell your spouse, "We have a problem."

One of the reasons that spouses postpone their complaints is that the way they complain often starts a fight. While the complaint does get the problem out on the table, it often wrecks what could have been a peaceful evening at home. And after the fight is over, the problem usually remains unsolved. So, how should you introduce a problem to your spouse in a way that doesn't lead to a fight, and makes it easy to solve?

First, this is what you should NOT do when presenting a problem to your spouse:

DO NOT make a demand. A demand is an effort to force your spouse to do what you want without consideration for how your spouse will feel doing it. "Do it, or else," is the clear message given in a demand, and it coveys an insensitivity to your spouse's feelings or interests. It's a Love Buster because demands withdraw love units. Instead of helping to solve a problem, it creates a new problem. A thoughtful request, on the other hand, is a good way to ask your spouse for help, because it takes his or her feelings into account. "How would you feel if you were to do this for me," introduces the problem with a willingness to negotiate a win-win solution.

DO NOT make a disrespectful judgment. When you present the problem, avoid expressing it as being the fault of your spouse. "If you were less selfish, we wouldn't have this problem," is an example of a disrespectful judgment that will get you nowhere. Instead of blaming your spouse for the problem, view it as a problem for you that is, apparently, not a problem for your spouse. Respectful persuasion is an effort to try to change your spouse's behavior that, in the end, will not only help you, but will help your spouse as well.

DO NOT have an angry outburst. Anger is your Taker's way of punishing your spouse when he or she does not give you what you want. It's not only an ineffective way to produce long-lasting change in your spouse's behavior, but it also destroys your spouse's love for you.

Granted, if you present your complaint in a thoughtful way, and your spouse responds with thoughtlessness, you will be very tempted to revert to your Taker's instincts by being demanding, disrespectful and angry. But it takes two to fight, and if your spouse does not respond positively to your presentation, simply end the discussion, and re-introduce your problem again later.

It's very important for both you and your spouse to do a good job meeting each other's emotional needs, and avoiding behavior that causes each other's unhappiness. But when either of you have a complaint, I suggest that you use this procedure:

First, state your complaint as clearly as possible, guaranteeing your spouse's safety by avoiding demands, disrespect or anger. Be cheerful as you discuss the problem, and try to make it brief.

Second, ask for your spouse's perspective on your problem. How does your spouse view this same situation and what might make it difficult for him or her to accommodate you?

Third, brainstorm possible solutions to the problems, looking for a plan that would solve your problem, and at the same time take your spouse's feelings into account. Avoid any solution where one of you gains at the other's expense. Don't give or expect sacrifice because that means that one of you will be losing love units so that the other can gain them. If you sacrifice for each other, in the end, you won't have the mutual love for each other that you want. But also recognize the importance of eventually finding a solution that solves the problem.

Finally, from your list of possible solutions, choose the one that has the enthusiastic agreement of both you and your spouse. That way, the solution will deposit love units into both of your Love Banks simultaneously. If you can't find one that meets that standard, keep brainstorming.

To guarantee your love for each other, you and your spouse must address each other's complaints as soon as they arise. Don't let your problems build up before you find solutions, because the longer you wait, the more love units you lose. But, if you're not careful, the way you go about presenting your problem and trying to find solutions can also cause you to lose love units.

You will not only deposit love units by solving the problems themselves, but you will also deposit love units in the very way you go about solving the problem, if you do it the right way.

Most couples lose love units whenever they have a conflict because they present their complaints with demands, disrespect and anger. And then they look for solutions that help one spouse but hurt the other. That's no way to resolve conflicts, and it's certainly no way to stay in love.

The better you become at stating your complaints with your spouse's feelings in mind, and then finding solutions with the same thoughtfulness, the more you will feel like getting to each problem immediately. But until you get to the place where you feel like presenting your problems as soon as they occur, do it anyway. Don't try to lower your expectations, and don't try to meet your own emotional needs. Instead, learn to become experts at meeting each other's emotional needs. That way you will have what you have always wanted -- a fulfilling and passionate marriage.

My boy Bruce has moved his blog to a bigger and better site so get your ass over there and check it out!

The Celebrity Ranker! Brought to you by Uberbitch


Cherry Pie ranks the...

* 2146th most popular

* 2785th most sexy

...out of the 6371 celebrities on this site.

Popularity = 4.712
(where 7=super popular, 1=not popular)

Sexiness = 6.1942%
(the percentage of web pages that think Cherry Pie is sexy)

Mrs. Fu-qtoo ranks the...

* 714th most sexy

* 5331st most popular

...out of the 6381 celebrities on this site.

Popularity = 1.699
(where 7=super popular, 1=not popular)

Sexiness = 34.0000%
(the percentage of web pages that think Mrs. Fu-qtoo is sexy)

How does this work? The celebrity ranker analyzes Google's database of web pages to determine what the Internet thinks about a celebrity. The ranking is entirely the opinion of a computer program.

Oh wee I'm sexy! ;-) Go find out just how sexy you are..

My good friend Andy Martello has asked his fans to take some fan pictures for his site. Because he such a nice, respectful man I decided to take a little pic for his site. So here you go Andy. Its not an uberbitch fan picture, but it comes from the bottom of my heart. Please understand I vaule my relationship with Richard way too much, and have some morals. But any who I hope you like it.

Wow some people go over board on trying to teach there kids a lesson.

Mom Allegedly Kills 12-Year-Old Daughter For Having Sex

Daughter Reportedly Forced To Drink Bleach

POSTED: 7:12 am EST January 17, 2005

BIRMINGHAM, Ala. -- A woman angry with her 12-year-old daughter for having sex forced the girl to drink bleach and sat on her until the child died, a police detective said. The girl's 9-year-old brother was forced to watch the attack, Detective Warren Cotton testified Thursday in a preliminary hearing for Tunisia Archie, 31. Archie is charged with capital murder in the asphyxiation death of her daughter Jasmine. If convicted, she could be sentenced to death or life in prison without parole. Cotton said Archie, who has been jailed without bond since shortly after her daughter's Nov. 26 death, told authorities she was disturbed because "her daughter told her that she was no longer a virgin." She said she poured bleach into Jasmine's mouth and the child vomited, he said, then sat on her until she stopped breathing, Cotton testified. Archie forced Jasmine's 9-year-old brother Jacorey to watch the attack and "told him that if he shed a tear that she was going to kill him, too," Cotton testified.

Thanks Joker for this article!

My Daily Picture!
It's Friday Yea!

Movies opening this weekend!
The first two you have to go see!

Are We There Yet? (PG); Wide release Nick, a smooth operator, is trying to land a date with a young, attractive divorcee, Suzanne. Problem is Suzanne is stuck working in Vancouver and miserable because she misses her kids. Seizing the opportunity, Nick gallantly offers to make her wish come true--and his own in the process--by bringing seven-year-old Kevin and eleven-year-old Lindsey up from Portland, Oregon to be reunited with their mom. What Nick doesn't know is that Suzanne's children think that no man is good enough for their mom and will do everything they can to make the trip a nightmare for him. Fasten your seat belts, it's going to be a bumpy ride. Starring: Ice Cube, Nia Long, Philip Bolden, Aleisha Allen, Henry Simmons Director(s): Brian Levant Assault on Precinct 13 (R); Wide release; opened 1/19 With only a few hours left in the calendar year, Precinct 13, one of Detroit's oldest precinct houses, is closing. Amid heavy snowfall and unsafe road conditions, only a few lawmen remain on duty for New Year's Eve. They are headed by Sergeant Jake Roenick, a good cop wrestling with bad memories of a fatal undercover 'op' from the previous spring. Roenick and Precinct 13 have both seen better days. Early on December 31st, deep in the city, formidable crime lord Marion Bishop, is cornered by an undercover cop. Their ensuing struggle leaves the cop dead--and Bishop, captured, by the Organized Crime and Racketeering Squad that Marcus Duvall runs. Bishop is handcuffed and herded onto a prison bus with several criminals: junkie Beck, hustler Smiley, and gang member Anna. But the battering snowstorm stops the bus well short of its high-security destination and strands it at the remote Precinct 13-- where, as night falls, the prisoners are temporarily incarcerated. This influx of prisoners irks Roenick, almost as much as visiting police psychologist Alex Sabian does. But Precinct 13's provocative secretary Iris Ferry and salty veteran cop Jasper Old School O'Shea won't let the increasing workload deter them from celebrating--until two masked gunmen break in and attack the guards from the bus. The gunmen are just barely beaten back, and everyone inside Precinct 13 realizes that more will come--to extract crime lord Bishop, but also armed and ready to shoot anyone and everyone else. The cops, looking to the reluctant Roenick for leadership, and the cons, looking to the steely Bishop for an angle, must join forces to live. Fortifying themselves with minimal weaponry and maximum courage, they will not go gently into the bad night. As they fight to the death, the thin lines between good and bad bleed together. Starring: Ethan Hawke, Laurence Fishburne, Michael Keaton, Maria Bello, John Leguizamo Director(s): Jean-François Richet The Phantom of the Opera (PG-13); Expands to wide release Based on the hit musical by Andrew Lloyd Webber, the tale tells the story of a disfigured musical genius who haunts the catacombs beneath the Paris Opera, waging a reign of terror over its occupants. When he falls fatally in love with the lovely Christine, the Phantom devotes himself to creating a new star for the Opera--exerting a strange sense of control over the young soprano as he nurtures her extraordinary talents. Starring: Gerard Butler, Emmy Rossum, Patrick Wilson, Minnie Driver, Miranda Richardson Director(s): Joel Schumacher

Damn this was funny



Brought to you by my boy over at TTR2

Here is my Daily Picture

Because Sunday is mine and Richard' s anniversary I wrote a poem that I hope makes him see how he make my life so complete. I love you Richard and here is too many many great years together.


For You Are The One

For you I would climb
The highest mountain peak
Swim the deepest ocean
For your love I do seek.

For you I would cross
The river so wide
Walk the hottest desert sand
To have you by my side.

For you are the one
Who makes me whole
You've captured my heart
And touched my soul.

For you are the one
That stepped out of my dreams
Gave me new hope
Showed me what love means.

For you alone
Are my reason to live
For the compassion you show
And the care that you give.

You came into my life
And made me complete
Each time I see you
My heart skips a beat.

For you define beauty
In both body and soul
Your soft, gentle face
More then beauty could hold .

For you are the one
God sent from above
The angel I needed
For whom I do love.

Daily Pic!

40 THINGS YOU'D LIKE TO SAY OUT LOUD AT WORK

1. "I can see your point, but I still think you're full of shit."
2. "I don't know what your problem is, but I'll bet it's hard to pronounce."
3. "How about never? Is never good for you?"
4. "I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public."
5. "I'm really easy to get along with once you people learn to see it my way."
6. "I'll try being nicer if you'll try being smarter."
7. "I'm out of my mind, but feel free to leave a message."
8. "I don't work here. I'm a consultant."
9. "It sounds like English, but I can't understand a damn word you're saying."
10. "Ahhh...I see the screw-up fairy has visited us again."
11. "I like you. You remind me of myself when I was young and stupid."
12. "You are validating my inherent mistrust of strangers."
13. "I have plenty of talent and vision. I just don't give a damn."
14. "I'm already visualizing the duct tape over your mouth."
15. "I will always cherish the initial misconceptions I had about you."
16. "Thank you. We're all refreshed and challenged by your unique point of view."
17. "The fact that no one understands you doesn't mean you're an artist."
18. "Any connection between your reality and mine is purely coincidental."
19. "What am I? Flypaper for freaks!?"
20. "I'm not being rude. You're just insignificant."
21. "It's a thankless job, but I've got a lot of Karma to burn off."
22. "Yes, I am an agent of Satan, but my duties are largely ceremonial."
23. "And your crybaby whiny-assed opinion would be...?"
24. "Do I look like a people person?"
25. "This isn't an office. It's Hell with fluorescent lighting."
26. "I started out with nothing and I still have most of it left."
27. "Sarcasm is just one more service we offer."
28. "If I throw a stick, will you leave?"
29. "Errors have been made. Others will be blamed."
30. "Whatever kind of look you were going for, you missed."
31. "I'm trying to imagine you with a personality."
32. "A cubicle is just a padded cell without a door."
33. "Can I trade this job for what's behind door #1?"
34. "Too many freaks, not enough circuses."
35. "Nice perfume. Must you marinate in it?"
36. "Chaos, panic, and disorder - my work here is done."
37. "How do I set a laser printer to stun?"
38. "I thought I wanted a career. Turns out I just wanted a salary."
39. "Who lit the fuse on your tampon?"
40. "Oh I get it... like humour... but different!"

Chris over at TTR2 Blog always puts some funny stuff together.

10 Things a Guy Doesn't Want to Hear From His In-Laws

10 Things a Guy Doesn't Want to Hear From His In-Laws

10. Well now that you're officially my son-in-law, it's time to let you in on some family secrets. Need a drink? No, seriously have a drink.

9. I have a couple of old suits that are too big for me. If you lose a little weight you just might fit into them.

8. I was wondering what kind of birth control you use... oh wait, you're not thinking about having more children are you?

7. We're thinking about buying the house across the street so we can help raise your kids.

6. How about this: We'll pay half of your medical bills if you promise to get a vasectomy.

5. I noticed our daughter has been out of sorts lately. Have you thought about using Viagra?

4. I want to take a group picture of the whole family. Here's the camera - you take the picture.

3. There are actually certain positions that make conception more likely. Here, come look at these drawings.

2. I hear the weather is going to be warm and clear the next few days. Maybe it would be a good time for you to get some yard work done.

1. Well isn't that funny - your baby has the same nose and ears as Craig! You know - the man she dated just before she met you.

Brought to you by Convicted

I hate when the kids do this!


Brought to you by TTR2.

Bad ass T-Shirts that you have to have!

Tell me you have been over too see my baby at Fu-qtoo? If not you have to get over there. They have got tons of shirt designs for you and for that man or lady in your life. Here is a couple of my favorites for you men.

Here's a couple for the ladies!

So what are you waiting for get over there and buy a damn shirt ;-)

For Christmas I bought Richard, his father and myself Dallas Cowboy's tickets for the game against Washington. Here is a picture of me and my honey from that game!

My Daily pic!

So Bruce wants some pictures Huh????????????????????????? I'll just run that passed Richard tonight and if all goes well "Hahahahahaha" I'll send them via email tommorrow.

But P.S. I wouldn't hold my breath Richard tends to be a little selfish when it comes to his women showing her body off to any Tom Dick and Harry on the Net. But I have to say that was a good try.

And P.P.S. I think I has some morals as well.

But any who GO check out Bruce's House I'm sure he won't have any problem finding some easy chick to show him some pics ;-)!

Hey Bruce Cherry Pie still loves you!

Ten Things Not To Say To Your New Girlfriend's Parents

Found this on TTR2 blog man that guy has some funny shit!

1. My parole officer thinks Sara has a calming effect on me.
2. Did you see that saucer that flew over town yesterday?
3. Which one of you taught Sara to give such great head?
4. Can you believe it! Those shitheads at the corner market won't cash my welfare check!
5. We're going to keep our relationship quiet for now. My wife can be rather vindictive at times.
6. Those home pregnancy kits aren't very reliable, in my opinion.
7. Sara is so pretty I've decided to give up being bisexual just for her.
8. Nice place you got here. That painting looks expensive. I bet a nice home like this came with a safe already built in, didn't it?
9. There ain't nothing that beats that great feeling of knowing your HIV test results are negative! I bet Sara's will be okay too.
10. Can I pull my car in your garage? I'm not sure how long that cop car will stay lost.

My little man and I!

My honey given me some loven!

Auto Rama is coming to Dallas Market Hall

Friday, February 11 3pm - 10:30pm
Saturday, February 12 10am - 10pm
Sunday, February 13 11am - 7pm



ADMISSION
Gate:General admissions $12.00 Children 6-12 $5.00 Children 5 and under Free

Discounts At O'Reilly Auto Parts:General Admission $10.00 Children 6-12 $3.00

FEATURES & SPECIAL SECTIONS
- General Lee From Dukes of Hazzard
- Street Rodder Magazine’s “50 Year’s of the Chevy Small Block”
- Import Tuner Magazine’s “Extreme Street”
- Super Chevy Magazine’s “Street Heat”
- “Bug-E-Bug” Space Age Volkswagon
- Trepanier’s Sickfish Cuda




SPECIAL GUEST APPEARANCES
- Ben Jones "Cooter" from TV’s “Dukes of Hazzrd”
Friday 6:00-9:00
Saturday 1:00-4:00 & 6:00-9:00
Sunday 1:00-4:00
- Courtney Hansen from TV’s “Overhaulin"
Saturday - 1:00-4:00 & 7:00-9:00
- World of Wheels Feature Models - Heather Tindell & Jennifer England
Friday 7:00-10:00
Saturday 12:00-5:00 & 7:00-9:00
Sunday 12:00-5:00
- Lita - WWE Superstar
Sunday 1:00-3:00

Hopefully we will get to go, I am a car enthusiasts!

Found these on TTR2Blog go over a check out the rest. Some are quite funny!

How To Be Really Annoying

Adjust the tint on your tv so that all the people are green, and insist to others that you "like it that way".
Drum on every available surface.
Sing the Batman theme incessantly.
Staple papers in the middle of the page.
Ask 800 operators for dates.
Produce a rental video consisting entirely of dire FBI copy warnings.
Sew anti-theft detector strips into people's backpacks.
Hide dairy products in inaccessible places.
Write the surprise ending to a novel on its first page.
Specify that your drive-through order is "to go".
Set alarms for random times.
Learn Morse code, and have conversations with friends in public consisting entirely of "Beeeep Bip Bip Beeeep Bip..."
Buy large quantities of mint dental floss just to lick the flavor off.
Order a side of pork rinds with your filet mignon.
Leave your Nine Inch Nails tape in Great Uncle Ed's stereo, with the volume properly adjusted.
Publicly investigate just how slowly you can make a "croaking" noise.
Honk and wave to strangers. How To Be Really Annoying
Adjust the tint on your tv so that all the people are green, and insist to others that you "like it that way".
Drum on every available surface.
Sing the Batman theme incessantly.
Staple papers in the middle of the page.
Ask 800 operators for dates.
Produce a rental video consisting entirely of dire FBI copy warnings.
Sew anti-theft detector strips into people's backpacks.
Hide dairy products in inaccessible places.
Write the surprise ending to a novel on its first page.
Specify that your drive-through order is "to go".
Set alarms for random times.
Learn Morse code, and have conversations with friends in public consisting entirely of "Beeeep Bip Bip Beeeep Bip..."
Buy large quantities of mint dental floss just to lick the flavor off.
Order a side of pork rinds with your filet mignon.
Leave your Nine Inch Nails tape in Great Uncle Ed's stereo, with the volume properly adjusted.
Publicly investigate just how slowly you can make a "croaking" noise.
Honk and wave to strangers.

Vote for my blog!

Hey go and vote for my Blog. When you click on link, go to search at the top of the screen then put in "Cherry Pie" it will direct you back to my blog then at the top of my blog click on the Green Smiley Face! But you have to give me a big smiley green face! Because you love Cherry Pie ;-)

Ohhhhhhhhhhh Look at the Babies!

Heres a little joke for you

A couple were going out for the evening. They'd gotten ready, all dolled up, dog put out, etc. The taxi arrives, and as the couple start out, the dog shoots back in the house. They don't want the dog shut in the house, so the wife goes out to the taxi while the husband goes upstairs to chase the dog out.

The wife, not wanting it known that the house will be empty explains to the taxi driver:"He's just going upstairs to say good-bye to my mother."A few minutes later, the husband gets into the cab.

"Sorry I took so long" he says. "Stupid bitch was hiding under the bed and I had to poke her with a coat hanger to get her to come out! Then I had to wrap her in a blanket to keep her from scratching and biting me as I hauled her ass downstairs and tossed her in the back yard! She better not shit in the vegetable garden again either!"

Brought to you by Big-Boys

Hell Ya its Friday and its almost 5:00! WooHoo!

So what does everyone have planned this weekend?

I'm sure we won't do anything tonight, then tomorrow is soccer which basically consumes our Saturday afternoon and evening, then Sunday Richard is going to do shirts all day. So guess I will lye on the couch and watch the football playoffs while I do laundrty and house work. Woohoo! Damn it hope next weekend is better. Richard & I have an anniversary on the 23rd so maybe we will get to go out one night next weekend? Yea

Nice drive in the country! Video

Thanks to Big-Boys

----------------"Daily Picture From My Web Cam"----------------

Weekend Box Office Top 10 as of 1/10/2005

Meet the Fockers
$28,498,160
White Noise
$24,113,565
The Aviator
$7,492,647
Lemony Snicket's A Series of Unfortunate Events
$7,438,867
Fat Albert
$5,748,443
Ocean's Twelve
$5,310,434
Spanglish
$4,251,776
National Treasure
$4,250,658
The Phantom of the Opera
$3,420,307
The Life Aquatic with Steve Zissou
$2,744,639

Movies opening this weekend

Coach Carter (PG-13); Wide release
Inspired by true-life story of controversial high-school basketball coach Ken Carter, who received both high praise and staunch criticism when he made national news in 1999 for benching his entire undefeated basketball team for poor academic performance.

Starring: Samuel L Jackson, 'Ashanti' Douglas, Rob Brown, Robert Ri'chard, Nana Gbewonyo
Director(s): Thomas Carter

Elektra (PG-13); Wide release
Not long after recovering from seemingly mortal wounds, Elektra, the deadly female ninja, has severed all ties with the world, living only for her next assignment. But in an unexpected turn of events, she is forced to make a decision that can take her life in a new direction - or destroy her. Key players in Elektra's journey are Stick, a blind martial arts master responsible for Elektra's "resurrection," and Mark Miller and Abby Miller, a father and daughter on the run from The Hand, a powerful syndicate whose members practice the dark martial art of ninjitsu.

Starring: Jennifer Garner, Joe Pantoliano, Terence Stamp, Kirstin Prout, Goran Visnjic
Director(s): Rob Bowman

In Good Company (PG-13); Wide release
Dan Foreman is headed for a shakeup. He is demoted from head of ad sales for a major magazine when the company he works for is acquired in a corporate takeover. His new boss, Carter Duryea, is half his age--a business school prodigy who preaches corporate synergy. While Dan develops clients through handshake deals and relationships, Carter cross-promotes the magazine with the cell phone division and Krispity Krunch, an indeterminate snack food under the same corporate umbrella. Both men are going through turmoil at home. Dan has two daughters, Alex, age 18, and Jana, age 16, and is shocked when his wife tells him she's pregnant with a new child. Carter, in the meanwhile, is dumped by his wife of seven months just as he gets his promotion. Dan and Carter's uneasy friendship is thrown into jeopardy when Carter falls for, and begins an affair with, Dan's daughter Alex.

Starring: Dennis Quaid, Topher Grace, Scarlett Johansson, Selma Blair, Clark Gregg
Director(s): Paul Weitz

Racing Stripes (PG); Wide release
In the middle of a raging thunderstorm, a traveling circus accidentally leaves behind some very precious cargo--a baby zebra. The gangly little foal is rescued by horse farmer Nolan Walsh, who takes him home to his young daughter Channing. Once a champion thoroughbred trainer, Walsh has given up horse training for a quiet life with Channing on their modest Kentucky farm. The little zebra, or "Stripes," as Channing calls him, is soon introduced to the farm's misfit troupe of barnyard residents, led by a cranky Shetland Pony named Tucker and Franny, a wise old goat who keeps the family in line. The group is joined by Goose, a deranged big-city pelican who's hiding out in the sticks until the heat dies down in Jersey. The un-aptly named bloodhound Lightening keeps a lazy eye on goings-on at the farm - in between naps. The Walsh farm borders the Turfway Racetrack, where highly skilled thoroughbreds compete for horse racing's top honor, the ultra-prestigious Kentucky Crown. From the first moment Stripes lays eyes on the track, he's hooked--he knows that if he could just get the chance, he could leave all those other horses in the dust. What he doesn't know is--he's not exactly a horse. But with characteristic zeal, he devotes himself to training for the big time, with a little help from Tucker, who has coached a host of champion racehorses in the past.

Starring: Frankie Muniz, Hayden Panettiere, Dustin Hoffman, Whoopi Goldberg, Mandy Moore
Director(s): Frederik Du Chau

Richad and I got to playing around and we took some pictures but of course
I had to do a little modifying. So here is my daily pic!

Oh my God this video was so funny I think I wet my pants!

Thank you Jackaroo

What would you think?

Bruces found this video its quite funny, check it out!

Here is a logo I put together for my web site.

Tell me what you think?

From my bud Roc.....

"WARNING"
This is a scam only dum blondes fall for!

Here are some top site you should really check out! Because Cherry Pie said so ;-)

Honey's Blog "NSFW"

Uberbitch

Jokers Linkdump

The Goose

Andy Martello

Convicted

TTR2

TTR2 Blog

Bruces House

Bruces Litter

Installed new software

Hey guys and gals just wanted to give ya'll an update on the blog. I installed HaloScan comment software. So in the process of doing so it has erased all the comments. But the good thing is it will be much easier for you to make your daily comments.

This is one of my favorite video's check it out!

I also laugh my ass off.

Found this on Jackaroo.

Guess the sign tells it all! WooHoo

Well it's Hump Day! Yea here my daily pic.

Is he right for me?

I had a girl friend come to me today asking my advice on should she say with her boyfriend she had been with for years or is it time to find someone whom she thinks could give her the things she wants. Knowing I suck #1 in realtionships, and #2 I don't wanna give her the wrong advice I decided to hop on line and reserch this. And believe it or not I found something very intresting.

When should you consider ending a relationship? Susan Quilliam looks at six key questions that will help you reach that important relationship decision - whether to commit, or whether to call it a day

Question 1: Is he genuinely available?
Question 2: Are your motives clean?
Question 3: Can he sustain a relationship?
Question 4: Does he want what you have to offer?
Question 5: Are you heading in the same direction?
Question 6: Can you turn things around?

Now as you read this you should also think about one other thing. Life isn't perfect and whom ever has made this world to believe that there are "perfect people" out there well they are full of shit. Now everyone has their preferances but if you decided to get into a comminted relationship with that person in the first place then you had to liked them in some way. And also something that my honey always tells me which is so true, you should try to focus on the things you do like about that person instead of focusing on all the things you don't like about them.

Is your partner a lier or a cheater?

As life has it 90% of the population is full of liers and cheaters. Here are some tips for you if you may think your partner might be one of the 90%.
I know all to well about those 90%, It took me going through hell and back serveral times in my love life to finally find a good honest man. Now if I could just get him off that damn computer more often. ;-).

Check out this arctile.

RIAA

So the RIAA thinks they can tell us what to do? We don't think so.

Here is a little video I found thanks to eBaum's. That I guess was made by the RIAA.

But the best part of all my baby at fu-qtoo has made a shirt that you can wear. So you too can show the RIAA what we think about their new law. Check it out!

Here I am sporting my RIAA shirt that I got from the guys at fu-qtoo.

Here I am working hard today!

What would you do?

Watch the video brought to you by eBaum's.

If this dude did this to my SUV I would get out and woop his black ass!

Hope this don't happen to you dude!

Don't you hate when the bitch says NO!

Got this from my friends over at jokaroo.

Wouldn't this suck if this happened to you! Hehehe.

This would so happen to me

Check this out got it from the guys over at jokaroo.

This was some funny shit, but the bad thing is this would so happen to me.

GunStar141

The Rise and Fall of Gunstar 141

Gunstar 141 is a free-form set of ramblings from the creative, somewhat troubled mind of the DNA Cowboy, Last of the Cowboys of Instruction..... So go check out his blog.

Why are men such ass holes?

Now this is my kind of girl! Check out her site.

Why are men such assholes?

Perhaps it's not our fault. Perhaps it's society? No really, hear me out...

A million years ago we walked around as cavemen humping everything and anything that moved. We had one mission, one instinct; to procreate. While we still have the same instinct, our mission has changed, or so it would seem.

Along come religion, The Gap, Joe Millionaire and suddenly we are made to believe in love, romance and monogamy. Not just believe in it, but to demand it, even kill for it.

As men, we expect our women to always look their best. To always be in the mood for sex and to shit perfume.

Even after pushing out a few kid's, making breakfast, lunch and dinner for your sorry ass you still expect your woman to be the hot sexy bitch she was ten years, 48 stretch marks and 3 kids later? Fuck you.

She has given up her body to perpetuate your family name, don't throw it in her face by screwing your secretary? How obvious is that? At the very least, pay for a whore and let your wife keep her dignity. She'll keep her dignity long after your dick falls off from some rampant sexual disease.

So ladies, take it all with a grain of salt. Your husband is not perfect. He simply loves women. Whether he runs around having elaborate affairs is of course something completely different.

This is for you Bruce

Somebody's boy toy needs to be tamned. Check out Bruce and his house and his litter.

Excuse me I'm doing the 12 steps in the SAA Program

Are you like me and have a sex addition? Take this quiz to see if you need the 12 step program also.

A Useful Tool for Self-Assessment

Answer these twelve questions to assess whether you may have a problem with sexual addiction.

1. Do you keep secrets about your sexual or romantic activities from those important to you? Do you lead a double life?
2. Have your needs driven you to have sex in places or situations or with people you would not normally choose?
3. Do you find yourself looking for sexually arousing articles or scenes in newspapers, magazines, or other media?
4. Do you find that romantic or sexual fantasies interfere with your relationships or are preventing you from facing problems?
5. Do you frequently want to get away from a sex partner after having sex? Do you frequently feel remorse, shame, or guilt after a sexual encounter?
6. Do you feel shame about your body or your sexuality, such that you avoid touching your body or engaging in sexual relationships? Do you fear that you have no sexual feelings, that you are asexual?
7. Does each new relationship continue to have the same destructive patterns which prompted you to leave the last relationship?
8. Is it taking more variety and frequency of sexual and romantic activities than previously to bring the same levels of excitement and relief?
9. Have you ever been arrested or are you in danger of being arrested because of your practices of voyeurism, exhibitionism, prostitution, sex with minors, indecent phone calls, etc.?
10. Does your pursuit of sex or romantic relationships interfere with your spiritual beliefs or development?
11. Do your sexual activities include the risk, threat, or reality of disease, pregnancy, coercion, or violence?
12. Has your sexual or romantic behavior ever left you feeling hopeless, alienated from others, or suicidal?

If you answered yes to more than one of these questions, we would encourage you to seek out additional literature as a resource or to attend an Sex Addicts Anonymous meeting to further assess your needs.

The only person that needs to assess my needs are my MAN! Right Richard.

Some cool sites you have to check out!

Of course My honeys t-shirt site!

My honeys blog which by the way has some pretty hot pictures of some yummy chicks!

One of the hottest and coolest chicks around Unberbitchs blog!

Joker has some funny shit on here!

A good friend of Richards Andy Martello a bad ass comic check out his land!

The Goose has his out look on life with some funny things added on!

Convicted has posts from his cell so check him out!

Mrs. Fu-qtoo in a Wet T-Shirt?

Helping my honey do some prmotion for his website. So we took a few t-shirts pics. Just so happens they were wet t-shirts. Hope you like!

Well here is Mrs. Fu-qtoo!
Mrs. Fu-qtoo

This is what I would get my honey if I was a rich mofo! Ford GT! Woowee!
Mrs. Fu-qtoo

Here why Richard should'nt work from home!

Here is why working at home isn't always the best idea..

Actually got this from my bud's website. Check out Jokers website he always has some neat shit.

Good friend of mine!

A good friend of mine Roc has made his own blog you should really check it. He has got some pretty funny as stuff on there.

Mrs. Fu-qtoo and the love of her life Richard!
Mrs. Fu-qtoo

The Man of My Life

Well the weekend is over and man did the love of my life suprise me! I'm certainly not a fan of facial hair and for the past year my man has had a half way beard. But last night he got out of the shower and he saved all of it off. WooHooo needless to say we made some monkey love lastnight. Well hope everyones weekend was as good!

This will be the last thing you say to you're wife! Before she kills your ass!

I found this from a cool chicks blog. You should check it beware UberBitch is a horney little toad. But I can't blame her!

"The Last Thing That You Should Ever Say To You're Wife"

1) “I know it’s a little awkward at first, but you’ll get used to her after a year or so.”
2) When away on a trip and calling home for the first time in a week the first thing you ask…"Is your ass still all big and stuff?"
3) "Hey honey, did you order all these hookers on my credit card?"
4) “I fucking hate you!”
5) “If you don’t quit your bitchin’ you’re going back into the laundry room until you’re done with your period!”
6) “This conversation's over.”
7) “Hey look Honey, your underwear are bigger than my head…..with a beach towel wrapped around it.”
8) "It’s DEFINITELY NOT the dress."
9) “Can I get a ride on Magic Mountain?”
10) When bitching your four feet of hair smells like Newports..."Yeah, how’s the pillow smell?" 11) When berating you on your behavior..."Spell it!"
12) “KNOW YOUR ROLE.”
13) “God Damn those stretch marks look like they hurt!”
14) “Smile like a donut.”
15) “Hey, I just got word from the insurance company, your life insurance was doubled. Wanna go skiing?”
16) “Go Lay Down!”
17) In your best inquisitive little kid voice..."Why’s your ass all big and stuff?” (Poking with your index finger is required)
18) “It’s not that I treat you poorly, it’s if I treat anyone any different.”
19) When the recipient of the age old and quite fun barb “Look Honey"...while watching the Male Enhancement Drug commercial of your choice E.G. Viagra, Cialis etc..."Now how will me ingesting that make you lose forty pounds?"
20) “It wouldn’t hurt so bad if you didn’t struggle!”
21) When trying to be kissed in public or the run of the mill P.D.A. “Common, knock that shit off, these people think you're my mother!”

So there you have it. You better not ever say this things to your women. Or else she will rip you a new ass hole.

You have to check this out!

Looks like Christina Aguilera and friends have been eating a little to much this Christmas!

This is something you just have to check out! Oh MY!

I laughed my ASS off!

Moulin Huge

Looking for a cool t-shirt?

Here is a bad ass web site that has some rock'n t-shirts that shows a little bite of everyone's personality!
Check it out! www.fu-qtoo.com

Here some of my fav's!

www.fu-qtoo.com

Things that are helpful in knowing

Did You Know That?

1. Drinking two glasses of Gatorade can relieve headache pain almost
immediately -- without the unpleasant side effects caused by traditional
"pain relievers."

2. Did you know that Colgate toothpaste makes an excellent salve for
burns?

3. Before you head to the drugstore for a high-priced inhaler filled with
mysterious chemicals, try chewing on a couple of curiously strong
Altoids peppermints. They'll clear up your stuffed nose.

4. Achy muscles from a bout of the flu? Mix 1 Tablespoon of horseradish in
cup of olive oil. Let the mixture sit for 30 minutes, then apply it as a
massage oil, for instant relief for aching muscles.

5. Sore Throat? Just mix 1/4 cup of vinegar with 1/4 cup of honey and
take 1 tablespoon six times a day. The vinegar kills the bacteria.

6. Cure urinary tract infections with Alka-Seltzer. Just dissolve two
tablets in a glass of water and drink it at the onset of the symptoms.

Alka-Seltzer begins eliminating urinary tract infections almost
instantly even though the product was never advertised for this use.

7. Eliminate puffiness under your eyes..... All you need is a dab of
preparation H, carefully rubbed into the skin, avoiding the eyes. The
hemorrhoid ointment acts as a vasoconstrictor, relieving the swelling
instantly.

8.. Honey remedy for skin blemishes... Cover the blemish with a dab of
honey and place a band-aid over it. Honey kills the bacteria, keeps the
skin sterile, and speeds healing. Works overnight.

9. Listerine therapy for toenail fungus... Get rid of unsightly toenail
fungus by soaking your toes in Listerine mouthwash. The powerful antiseptic
leaves your toenails looking healthy again.

10. Easy eyeglass protection... To prevent the screws in eyeglasses from
loosening, apply a small drop of Maybelline Crystal Clear nail polish to the
threads of the screws before tightening them.

11. Coca-Cola cure for rust... Forget those expensive rust removers.
Just saturate an abrasive sponge with Coca Cola and scrub the rust stain.
The phosphoric acid in the coke is what gets the job done.

12. Cleaning liquid that doubles as bug killer... If menacing bees, wasps,
hornets, or yellow jackets get in your home and you can't find the
insecticide, try a spray of Formula 409. Insects drop to the ground
instantly.

13. Smart splinter remover... just pour a drop of Elmer's Glue all over the
splinter, let dry, and peel the dried glue off the skin. The splinter sticks
to the dried glue.

14. Hunt's tomato paste boil cure... cover the boil with Hunt's tomato paste
as a compress. The acids from the tomatoes soothe the pain and bring the
boil to a head.

15. Balm for broken blisters... To disinfect a broken blister, dab on a few
drops of Listerine... a powerful antiseptic.

16. Heinz vinegar to heal bruises... Soak a cotton ball in white vinegar and
apply it to the bruise for 1 hour. The vinegar reduces the blueness and
speeds up the healing process.

17. Kills fleas instantly. Dawn dish washing liquid does the trick.
Add a few drops to your dog's bath and shampoo the animal thoroughly.
Rinse well to avoid skin irritations. Goodbye fleas.

18. Rainy day cure for dog odor... Next time your dog comes in from the
rain, simply wipe down the animal with Bounce or any dryer sheet,
instantly making your dog smell springtime fresh.

19. Eliminate ear mites... All it takes is a few drops of Wesson corn oil in
your cat's ear. Massage it in, then clean with a cotton ball. Repeat daily
for 3 days. The oil soothes the cat's skin, smothers the mites, and
accelerates healing.

20. Vaseline cure for hair balls..... To prevent troublesome hair balls,
apply a dollop of Vaseline petroleum jelly to your cat's nose. The cat will
lick off the jelly, lubricating any hair in its stomach so it can pass
easily through the digestive system.

21. Quaker Oats for fast pain relief.... It's not for breakfast anymore! Mix
2 cups of Quaker Oats and 1 cup of water in a bowl and warm in the microwave
for 1 minute, cool slightly, and apply the mixture to your hands for
soothing relief from arthritis pain.

Ok here we go I'm starting my own blog since I was told I couldn't do it. Don't ever under estimate the power of "Ms. Cherry Pie"!